Monthly Archives: September 2020

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Say what you do and do what you say

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We perceive other levels of honesty and moral uprightness based on their actions (words and deeds).  People who do not follow through can lose respect and trust very quickly.

That is not to say you must accomplish every objective and goal you expound on in order for others to view you as having a high level of integrity.

Open, Clear, and Forthright

Things change and new circumstances may make if less feasible or even impossible for you to complete your initial commitment  (i.e.,  you said it but could not do it.)

However, when what you committed to changes, openly communicating this, and discussing options with those impacted mitigates your risk of being perceived as dishonest.

Blindly Forging Ahead

Making a personal commitment does not entail being successful at all costs but collaborating with others to achieve positive outcomes when the unforeseen occurs is critical.

Blindly forging ahead with your initial approach when it has become unfeasible can be both painful and unproductive.  Our moral foundation will not be cracked because we fail, only if we ignore that failure and hide it from others.

Explore Alternatives

When I was young my parents use to advise me; Succeeding is important but trying is critical.  If we have accepted accountability for a task or deliverable it is possible we won’t achieve it.

This does not impinge upon our integrity as long as we both tried and kept everyone who will be impacted apprised of our efforts and well as consulting them and seeking assistance where it makes sense.

Maintain your personal integrity with others – try your best and keep them informed.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

How do you feel?

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We all have a natural instinctive state of mind deriving from our circumstances, mood, or relationships with others.  These emotions drive our behavior.
Our feelings are not based on logic but rather they are intuitive and can even be hereditary reactions.   Our emotional response will not always result in optimal behavior based on the situation.

Logic or Emotion

The interesting paradigm presented by emotional behavior was cleverly illustrated in the original Star Trek television show.  One of the crew members belonged to a race (Vulcan) which could not experience emotion.

Amn oft viewed scenario on the show was the Vulcan character (Spock) opining on others behavior as being illogical.  Sometimes the emotional behavior proved best and sometimes disastrous.

Life Without Emotion

Seeing life without emotion, as envisioned by the TV shows creative talent was fascinating to say the least (another perspective oft spoken by Spock when observing others act emotionally).

The show very much put emotional behaviour into perspective and helped me understand the value of checking your feelings before acting.

Behave to Achieve

By checking my emotions before reacting I enabled myself the opportunity of acting in the optimal way to satisfy my desires.  Often the ungaurded reaction, based on how you are feeling at any given time, is not the best approach.

Logical analysis can often help determine the better way.

Surprisingly, determining how you feel e.g., anger, saddness, happy, excited is not difficult.  Holding your actions in check until you are ready to act appropriately is a little more difficult given the energy associated with emotion, but doable and worth it.

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Manage Risk Don’t Worry

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There is almost always the potential for danger, harm or loss with everything we undertake, that is a risk.   This can lead to anxiety or unease as we allow ourselves to dwell on upcoming difficulties or troubles, that is worry.

Often when we are exposed to danger, harm, or loss our emotions kick in, and rather react in a logic-planned way we panic and get anxious.

Substitute Risk Management

Some of you will remember the popular Mad magazine character from the sixties or seventies – Alfre E Neuman.  His tag line was “What?  Me worry”.  (Not sure what his motivation was.)

Personally, I emulate that motto but my rationale is based on constant and effective risk management.   Things we worry about stem from the risk of something untoward occurring and if we plan to prevent it or how we will manage if it occurs then, why worry?

Think Ahead

Basically when you undertake a goal or plan an activity think about possible outcomes.  Don’t overthink it, that in itself can be worrisome, but consider reasonable possibilities.

Some of the things that might occur might be less than pleasant, bothersome, or even totally undesirable.  Mitigating these risks, that is planning what to do if they occur to lessen the damage or even prevent occurrence are things you can do.

By preparing for risk and being ready to take action as needed you to remove the unknown, fear, anxiety, and uncertainty is tamed, and voila worry is gone.

Hard to believe but it is that simple.  What? Me worry.  Why would I engage in a needless and unsettling emotional activity?  I can see no rational reason to do so.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Which comes first

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I often run into people seeking answers.  My counsel to them is unlike the popular game show, Jeopardy, it does not make sense to start with the answer.

The answers we seek cannot be uncovered without a clear understanding of the question.  That is where to begin.  Spending time and effort seeking to find answers is a much more efficient process if it is focused.

Clarity of Purpose

Taking the time to fully understand the question is an effort well worth undertaking.  It helps us avoid responses that are not really relevant to what we seek, but appear to be.

Sometimes digging into what the question really is can provide answers.  For example, consider the simple question “Why is the sky blue”.

Are we really trying to determine the reason for the sky’s color or is it what the sky is composed of (which results in blue color) the answer we seek.

Or do we want to understand why the region starting from land and reaching outer space exists, that is what is the purpose of the sky and why does it exist and do we need it, can we use it for something?

Solid Foundation

Research into a topic is best conducted when the object of the research is well defined.  This process of determining what we are actually trying to answer, that is creating the question is not only a critical beginning but also time-consuming.

The value equation, spending time up front to think through and clarify the question more often than not results in clear and high-quality answers.

Without understanding the question we really cannot arrive at an answer.

 

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Learning for Life

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Do we need a reason for practicing continuous learning?  Whether formal or informal is the motivation to learn best just driven by the potential to gain knowledge, rather than a specific social or monetary goal.

The ongoing acquisition of knowledge or skills through experience, study, or by being taught directly by others undoubtedly has value even if the return on investment cannot be specifically defined.

What percent of my personal health and wealth is attributable to ongoing learning?  I do not have an exact measure in monetary terms but  I have always found ways to leverage my knowledge gains even if only to improve my feeling of personal well-being.

Embrace the Experience

Learning objectives are generally focused on specific topics and learning objectives (e.g., mathematics) however the ways we are taught and how it is received is an important part of the learning experience itself (beyond just the content).

Ongoing interaction with teachers and other learners can go well beyond the learning objectives.  Social interactions or working together with others to gather and collate information provides a side learning opportunity to increase our overall maturity.

Sometimes the most important knowledge gains are derived from the ad hoc or informal practices associated with structured learning.

Practice

All areas we undertake to upgrade our knowledge from time to time don’t need to be associated with specific future plans.  That is we do not need to take a course or training with a specific goal in mind.

Ultimately should find a way to employ the outcomes of our training when done. Without practice or actually using the knowledge we gained, learning may be wasted.

In some cases though exactly how we are going to leverage what we learned might not be clear to us until we are done.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Feedback

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Lately I have found more people using the term feedback when they are more accurately providing advice.   Granted there is a fine line between these terms, but they do have different foci.

Feedback involves providing information about your reactions to something or someone (e.g, a person’s performance of a task)  which can be used by them as a basis for improvement.

The giving of advice seems similar to feedback but is more specific.  It involves guidance or action recommendations offered with regard to prudent future action.

Gently Done

Whether couched as advice or feedback, providing direction to others must be done with care lest it is misconstrued as criticism.  Perceived criticism is likely to result in resistance by the recipient as a natural reaction.

The giving of feedback can be tricky in this regard as by it’s nature the points of improvement imply criticism about actions to date.  Consider providing advice or couching the feedback as an opportunity to make it more palatable.

Overcome Resistance

Both advice and feedback can be useful tools but my experience is the natural reaction by most recipients is auto-shutdown.  That is, as soon as you offer advice or feedback you lose your audience.

Suggestions and recommendations, not explicitly stated as such but worded accordingly work much better.  You may still achieve your objective of giving some advice or feedback but it is more likely to be received positively when delivered softly.

A word to wise, when you are providing advice or feedback always includes the reasons why someone should be motivated to accept what you propose.  Action usually will not result without motivation.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

A sense of wonder

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Embrace the feeling of surprise and admiration that occurs when you see something beautiful, unexpected, unfamiliar, or inexplicable.
This sense of wonder can drive creativity.  The feelings associated with wonder are driven by curiosity and create a desire to know more, to discover.  This is the underpinning of innovation. 

Keep it Real

Wonder often starts with things we don’t understand but which have something exceptional about them that draws us in.   The mystery of the thing is compelling.

Acknowledging the unknown exists is our first step but then processing the reality of the situation we are wondering about can lead us to something better.

We must determine the underlying factors that create the object of our wonder as these will allow us to both replicate and expand on that which we wonder about.

Embrace the Opportunity

Things that amaze represent an opportunity for you to use them.  First work on understanding the phenomenon and then let your thoughts turn toward how to leverage it.

How can you use the power of this amazing and mysterious experience to improve yourself, and others.   It makes sense not to ignore your curiosity but build on it.  Things that make you wonder can be fuel for your creativity, to your benefit.

Beautiful, amazing yet mysterious, the thing you see and experience that develops a sense of wonder can provide you with a chance to surprise both others and yourself, seize the moment.

Take Action

Viewing and experiencing the wonders of the world may take your breath away but this is just wasted is you do not use the feeling to expand the opportunity.    Don’t just enjoy the things you wonder about use them to your benefit.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Submit and Hope

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Relying on hope as your strategy will produce outcomes, good or bad, that are basically due to chance.  Without a plan of action or policy designed to achieve your goals, the results are in essence derived from happenstance.

While feelings of expectation and desire for certain things to occur is a valid emotion it is never the best approach to taking action and working to achieve your dreams.

Greater Uncertainty

For example, if your goal is to increase your fiscal wealth, purchasing a lottery ticket, submitting the numbers, and hoping for a windfall of cash is an option and sometimes it can pay off.

Basically, though this approach is based on chance.  How you choose your numbers, or how many you submit might affect the chances but overall this strategy is simply put – submit and hope.

Improve your chances

It has been well said, “Nothing is certain” but having a solid strategy increases the likelihood you will be able to achieve your desires.  Uncertainty still exists but can be diminished through planning.

Working out a set of actions to achieve your goals (e.g. increase your personal wealth) will not guarantee results but if formulated based on research, logical, and analysis the opportunity for success is increased.

Not to abandon hope

This is not to say that hope does not have value.  Hope underlies optimism and without it, life can be very depressing.  However, relying on hope alone is not a valid strategy if you truly seek to achieve success.

Do not abandon hope but also do not underpin your plans solely with hope.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Stay Sharp

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I watched an interesting Ted Talk the other day by Chris Bailey, “How to get your brain to focus”.   My own key take-away was the potential of leveraging boredom to sharpen your mind.

This led me to research the topic further.  It turns out there is strong scientific evidence that the brain is more active and open to the development of ideas and plans in what is termed the default mode (i.e., boredom).

Not Natural

Given the opportunity for boredom to result in positive thinking and creative, innovative ideas simply by being bored, I wondered why boredom is typically avoided.

Our natural inclination is to be overloaded.  Attention spans are guided by the need for hyper-activity in our brains.  This is how we are genetically wired as a species.

In fact, bouncing from one activity to another or even conducting a number of activities in parallel (multitasking) is easier for us to do than being in a situation without anything in particular to do.

When we are not focused on our surroundings or feel that a day or period is dull or tedious our minds tend to wander.  They do not shut down, in fact, studies have shown in these situations brain activity actually increases.

Boredom with Regularity

In his Ted Talk Chris suggests we sharpen our minds through the practice of boredom for an hour each day.   He suggests his own experience was a significant increase in the developing of ideas and creating plans on how to make them a reality.

In short, he believed, for him, it really works.  Avoiding boredom can be in fact counter-productive.  Not sure if I like the concept because I am lazy or because it is a good idea,  but I am definitely giving it a try.

 

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Destiny

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Some believe there are a set of pre-ordained events that will necessarily happen in the future.  This is our destiny.  Perhaps by definition whatever we do,  our destiny is inevitable.

I question the validity of the concept and  I wonder, should we wait for our destiny to just occur or can we self forge it through our actions?

Influence/Control

We can all exercise influence on both others and events. That is we have the ability to try and effect changes in the behavior of someone or something, or the actual effect itself.

Our attempt might not achieve the results we seek but nothing limits us from making the attempt beyond our own motivation and desire to do so.  Taking control can be through the exercise of influence, granted power, or a combination of both.

Personal granted power is an interesting phenomenon as it enables us to command actions from others whose subservience is largely psychological (more about power in a future blog topic).

Shit Happens

Destiny occurs when we can neither exercise influence nor have granted the power to make the change or cause events to occur as we desire.

This is sort of the “shit happens” or “it is what it is mentality”.  It means acknowledging and accepting there was nothing you could do.

Unfortunately, a belief in destiny can cause us to let things occur when in fact we did have options and could take steps/plans to achieve better outcomes.

Destiny, things out of our control probably do exist but perhaps far less than we perceive.  After all, if you don’t try to go up against what is perceived as inevitable, then, of course, that is what it will be.