Tag Archives: honesty

Say what you do and do what you say

We perceive other levels of honesty and moral uprightness based on their actions (words and deeds).  People who do not follow through can lose respect and trust very quickly.

That is not to say you must accomplish every objective and goal you expound on in order for others to view you as having a high level of integrity.

Open, Clear, and Forthright

Things change and new circumstances may make if less feasible or even impossible for you to complete your initial commitment  (i.e.,  you said it but could not do it.)

However, when what you committed to changes, openly communicating this, and discussing options with those impacted mitigates your risk of being perceived as dishonest.

Blindly Forging Ahead

Making a personal commitment does not entail being successful at all costs but collaborating with others to achieve positive outcomes when the unforeseen occurs is critical.

Blindly forging ahead with your initial approach when it has become unfeasible can be both painful and unproductive.  Our moral foundation will not be cracked because we fail, only if we ignore that failure and hide it from others.

Explore Alternatives

When I was young my parents use to advise me; Succeeding is important but trying is critical.  If we have accepted accountability for a task or deliverable it is possible we won’t achieve it.

This does not impinge upon our integrity as long as we both tried and kept everyone who will be impacted apprised of our efforts and well as consulting them and seeking assistance where it makes sense.

Maintain your personal integrity with others – try your best and keep them informed.

Compassion and Understanding

Communicating in accordance with fact or reality, or a fact or belief that is accepted as true by the majority, is said to be speaking (or writing the truth.

The impact of the truth can sometimes be devastating and so the truth is often best tempered by compassion and understanding.  Both inner truths and those you share with others.

Temper the Message

An old but accurate missive says “The truth can hurt”. Truth is a cornerstone of integrity and trust, it should never be used as a weapon of pain.

Speaking the truth with compassion and understanding is simply a way of crafting the message, still with honesty and integrity, in a way that does no harm.

Blackmail

Using the truth to gain advantage over others, financial or otherwise  (i.e., blackmail) , is deplorable.  This is a case of misuse.  Sometimes it is best to hold wise counsel.

Speaking the truth clearly and broadly is not a required action and should be treated as a matter of discretion .  When communicating or sharing information consider the impact.

Blindly proceeding righteously proclaiming it is true so I can disclose it could be hurtful and ultimately lead to poor results.  You may think it can help achieve your goals but it could in fact backfire on you.

Blackmail is a criminal offence after all.

Internalize

Before sharing the truth boldly and bluntly ask yourself “ How would I feel about this message.”. If it makes you sad or uncomfortable, fearful or angry maybe it’s time to use a little compassion and understanding to craft a softer more amenable truth.