Tag Archives: built in behaviour

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

What would you Do?

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Yesterdays post was about two key measures used to identify leaders.  Intellectual skills and behaviour skills.  These two measures have been labled EQ and IQ.

In essence these measures are just predictors of how a person will behave.  That is, what would you do if…..?

How it works

For example if you saw an obnoxious drunk bother patrons in a public place you would:

  1. call security
  2. confront the drunk
  3. ignore the situation
  4. gather more data before deciding what to do
  5. leave

Persons with behaviour characteristics high in empathy or motivation would most likely take action 1 or 2.  Intellectually focused would take 4 or possibly 5 ( depending on the results of 4.  )

Those with average or low leadership tendencies probably go with the default.   Do nothing.

Many psychology experments have been conducted using tests to acertain IQ and EQ and then used scenarios to determine what the testee’s do.  In some cases rather than scenarios some of these studies used past behaviours.

Consistently, the behaviour you would expect intuitively based on the IQ and EQ measures  (  like the example above) was confirmed.

Think about it

A very powerful technique for improving your EQ  consists of walking yourself through significant scenarios you participated in over the last month and remembering how you behaved.

Were your objectives met.  Or if met was it efficient and pleasant?  What EQ characteristic behaviours could you have used for a better result.  Did others consider your actions kindly and effective?

Use the outcomes from these key experiences to drive improvement in the way you behave.  That is identifying what could be down better and what personal behaviours you need to change for that to become reality.

You can be a great leader, make it so.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Learning from the children

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As I think about how I have lived my live to this point, my successes and short comings,  I am satisfied.  By this measure, the way I have lived my live maps to my key personal objective – maximum pleasure.

I feel good about the way I live and it gives me pleasure.  More satisfying though, and probably not an objective perspective,  is my perception of my childrens lives.

All our children are fully mature adults and my observation of their  lives, achievements, values and goals is they have bettered me in every way.

All our children  demonstrate maturity and leadership far beyond my own, albeit that it pains me to think this way.  It is after all all about me, I struggle with being bested.

Life Reverses Itself

At some point in recent years, I am not exactly sure when, I began to gain more from observing how my own offspring behave and react, but it happened.  Emulating them  now helps me grow and makes me a better person.

The point where I was the example, the teacher, the elder has reversed.   Suddenly I am learning from them.  The student surpasses the teacher.

When I think about it, this was probably our parental goal all along.  However, while  my wife and I only laid the foundation our children themselves are soley accountable for thier achievements.

And so, unlike the iconic song by Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young -“Teach your children well” what goes around comes around and now it is more like “Teach your parents well”.

 

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Life Long Learning

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Learning comes in many forms from the formal, to just straight up experiential.  Everyone is exposed to some form of learning moments  throughout  their lives, for many I would argue there is a daily chance for a learning experience.

Whether we absorb, store and ultimately how we use the learning we are exposed to (if we use it at all) is unique to each individual.   Some not only learn, but share what they have learned (teaching).

Formal Learning

Formal learning. which usually includes some form of validation (testing) and often provides recognition (things like a certificate, professional qualification, post secondary degree, license to practice, etc) is valued and the teacher(s) are frequently paid for providing the learning service.

Formal learning comes in a variety of formats from one on one teaching to classroom or online courses  and a plethora of variations and is sometime confused as the main and perhaps only way to “learn”

Informal Learning/ Take Care to be Aware

Keen observation and awareness of our surroundings and paying attention to each interaction we incur through out our day is key to attaining benefit from all the informal learning opportunities that come your way each day.

What did that communication you just received really mean?  The actions you just observed created a result, is there an identifiable root cause?  Is it repeatable?

The more we let these learning experiences pass us by the more we miss out the opportunity to build our knowledge and capabilities.

Youth as learning sponges

When we are young the questions typically come fast and furious.  This is just typical human behavior, these questions are learning moments.

As time goes by (and we grow older) the questions are less frequent and even sometimes discouraged or treated as socially unacceptable.   How often have you heard “enough, no more questions, just do it?”

Both the learning moments and knowledge sharing chances require patience – on everyone’s part.

Take Advantage

Consider the value and benefit to your own happiness from embracing the opportunity to make a key aspect of your life about life long learning, leveraging every chances you get both formal and informal.  Don’t let life pass you by.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Programming Non Violence

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In yesterday’s post I postulated that an evolutionary change was needed if humankind was to achieve a simple state where we could all be friends.

I received feedback that was neither feasible nor, even if achievable, practical.

Consider Artificial Intelligence

Sci-fi author Issac Asimov proposed the three laws of robotics:

 

  • A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
  • A robot must obey the orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
  • A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws

What if we were able to manipulate the human genome such that these principles could be genetically coded (similar to the way we would program them in a robot) and thus they would become universally adopted by all humans.  In essence, the basic genetic coding of the human race would eliminate man’s violence against man.

Being programmed into our genetic make-up would mean managing your violent behavior would not need to be learned.   Rather than training everyone in one of the key tenants of civilization, it would be built in.  And we all live happily ever after – focus on the ALL.

What about…….?

Does this make the controller/programmer of the human genome a God.  That is the all powerful power that guides human behavior.  By engineering our own genetic make-up are we treading where only God is supposed to play.

To quote the News of World newspaper headline of a couple of weeks ago, following the latest mass killing in the U.S.,  “God won’t fix this”

Arguably engineering the human genome is not godlike but rather an exercise of intelligence and common sense.  I recognize this is a very controversial position though and I am not promoting it but rather exposing the thought here for dialogue purposes.

And if we control free will, that is to say by removing the ability to decide to be violent against your fellow man, are we not in some way limiting human capability by restricting the freedom to act in any way.

Philosophically speaking….

This is an interesting topic, personally I am not sure there is a right answer; however, I am pretty convinced man’s violence against man is wrong.

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Don’t Tell Me What to Do!

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Have you every noticed how most of the time you use the phrase “Can I give you some advice”, immediately the target of your advice raises their shields.

Over the years I have come to learn people actually like and appreciate advise, as long as it is hidden in some subterfuge.   It has been my experience most people don’t like to be told what to do, directly.  Indirectly seems to work okay.   I wonder is this is some standard genetic disposition or a built in behavior, something like the well known fight or flight.

Sort of like, you here the words ” Can you do it this way?” and wham the defensive reaction kicks in.

How Can We Help?

Using questions is a great way to pass on suggestions or even direction.  Something like ” Have you thought about using the break to stop the car before we hit the guy in front of us?

Just kidding , this could be a good use of a question but sarcasm usually does not work well.  This example, exaggerated as it is, does give the idea, gently create the seed of an idea using an indirect approach.

My own experience is the direct approach rarely works and even if the target of your friendly advice appears receptive, trust me they are not.  It’s sort of built in human behavior and like the fight or flight reaction often we cannot even control it if we wanted to.

So what do you think?

Is this a technique worth trying?  Why not give it a whirl next time you are trying to be helpful.  You could be surprised by the results.