Category Archives: Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Making the Wrong Choice

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Not choosing for fear of making the wrong choice can actually be more harmful then choosing incorrectly.  This is commonly known in bureaucratic  circles as analysis paralysis.

Choosing incorrectly can have catastrophic potentially irreversable results but within reasonable risk limits, not choosing can lead to different but still painful negative results, possibly over a longer term.

Mistakes are Necessary

The value equation associated with decision is a balance between the potential negative outcomes versus positive outcomes  weighed against the time factor.

In many cases the longer it takes to make the decision (usually the cautious approach) can diminish the likelyhood of positive outcomes.

On the other hand, deciding without enough factual information increases the risk of negative results.  Taking too long though could result in the decision seeming sound but in fact due to changes over time it has become flawed.

Don’t Focus on the Mistake

Lack of action most frequently leads to lack of results.  This is an argument for making a decision and acting even if there is a potential for error.

However, this needs to be a balanced approach based on the decision value equation.  Ultimately, there is never a certainty of a positive result but with reasoned analysis the likelyhood of success can be estimated.

Fear of being wrong should not be a factor in whatever action is selected but rather likelyhood of a positive versus a negative result.

The message of this post, don’t let fear rule, no worries being acting and being wrong is far better than not acting at all.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

The power of people

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Often a quote will get me thinking.  Todays subject is about the power of working together, triggered by a quote from Helen Keller.

“Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much.”

About Helen Keller

Many will have heard of Helen Keller, she accomplished much in her life time.  Helen was the first deaf and blind person to receive a bachelor of arts degree.

Her life is a shining example of individual achievement.  I can’t image graduating from University without the sense of hearing let alone without sight.  Of course without hearing, learning to talk alone is pretty tricky.

What is so illuminating about this quote is not the content, probably a bit intuitive, but rather the source.  That such a pillar of individual strength and achievement would highlight the benefit of a team.

Without Others

Setting her goal, understanding/ creating personal motivation and perservering are all key hallmarks of Helen Kellers life.  Yet even Helen realized, and clearly voiced it, she might not have been able to do it alone.

People collaberating, joining forces, supporting each other every step of the way create a powerful and effective force.  Where an individual might struggle a team will often forge ahead and succeed

Step One

There are many books and tools around effective teamwork practices.  The ideas and  techniques are of great value but the first step is recognition and understanding of the power of a group over an idividual.

That is the first step to unleashing the power of teams.

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Who is at fault?

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Had a very interesting hypothetical discussion today about imperial aggression.  The conversants different perspectives highlighted how your personal values and beliefs – formed from your cultural upbringing,  strongly inflence your interpretation of the facts.

Who is Right?

Was America the agressor in Iraq or just reasonably defending themselves from weapons of mass destruction.  Given they are still present in Iraq, and the “WMD” myth has long been settled, this is a fair question?

How about the Syrian rebels, is their unknown source of funding (weapons, food and fuel) justified in supporting them.  There was even a suggestion this source of funding was from Israel in support of the empire building objectives ( destabilize, then attack).

And of course the Russians are supporting Assad, is this right, is it fair or is it just in support of Russia’s hidden empire building objectives.

So Many Questions/So Many Answers

For me, the  most interesting observation was the multiple good but very different answers to these questions, each with powerful fact based supporting rationale.

So again, who is right?

If a thief broke into your home and was clearly identified on camera, which alternative actions are justified:

  • you break into the thiefs home and steal everything back.
  • you report to the police and they arrest the thief.
    •  In court the thief the thief is convicted and goes to jail
    • In court the thief is cleared on a technicality
  • You beat the thief up in anger and he reports you to the police for attacking him, you go to jail or maybe get off.
  • the thief sends his cousins to retaliate, they beat you up

Unfortunately all of these are viable outcomes of the theft and I have learned from experience there will be a variety of views as to which action is best, fairest and justifiable.

And so it is with world affairs, not so easy to figure out right and wrong, although your own cultural background, upbringing and geographic loyalties will probably influence your decision.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Outside Influences

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Regular readers will know that I am a strong believer in the philosophy of personal accountablity.  Your behaviour, how  you feel, in essence your life style, only has one owner – you.

Even if you are a beliver and practitioner of your own absolute control over your destiny,  the influence your day to day environment has can be very powerful.

What we do each day matters

Whether your daily routine is working for someone, for yourself, taking care of others or any of the numerous ways we keep ourselves occupied day in and day out, regardless of how strongly you believe in your ability to fully control how you feel and act, the daily routine has a powerfull impact on your ability to do so.

(That last sentence is a doozy so you may want to read it again slowly.)

If you need a change, make it so

When you recognize the power of the environmental influences is impacting your ability to maintain control, that is continuing to feel good about yourself is a chore it might be time to seek a change in your main daily activities (e.g., your job or business)

Typically is this a difficult decision and a hard one to arrive at.  Some are fortunate that their employer makes it for them, or there business goes down the tubes.  While others suffer internally for years.

 

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Constructive Criticism

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Yesterdays post was about my thoughts on critisicm.  A number of readers let me know what they thought about my comments and this led to some robust discussions.

Not surprising, the result is a follow on post by me with some additional opinions (yes they are my subjective opinions on the topic).  The focus today is on constructive criticism and praise.

Praise then Criticize, Is it really Constructive

My personal experience has been praise is a much more powerful tool for influencing behaviour change.  This is the underlying principle behind the well known phrase ” use the carrot instead of the stick”

Whether a human or a donkey we respond better to the reward then to the punishment.  Praise is like a reward (it makes you feel good)  and criticism a punishment ( it hurts).

Constructive critisicm is nothing more than a reward (praise) to fool you into being receptive, thinking something good is coming and then whack, negative feedback.

Does anyone really believe that people fall for this approach.  It is so obvious and in reality the praise is fully diluted by the put down which follows, and so ultimately has no effect.

Positive Criticism

Of course if constructive criticism does not work for you there is always my favorite oxymoron to fall back on, i.e., positive criticism. Criticism is by definition about something wrong.

When telling someone their mistakes the topic is negative in nature.  It just is.  So in essence positive criticism is basically combining “positive/negative “comments. Oh joy, I bet that works.

If you want to influence behaviour my suggestion is to try positive reinforcement and just positive reinforcement. It works.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Criticism

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I am not a appreciative of the expression of disapproval by someone  based on my perceived faults or mistakes (i.e., criticism).  After all, I can figure out and correct my own faults and mistakes.

The well known basketball player Lebron James said “I like criticism, it makes you strong.”. Really, how so?  For me, criticism makes me angry, not strong and I don’t like it.

The Value Equation

What gives more value, identifying, understanding and self correcting your own faults or being made to feel inadequate by some one else for whom your faults probably provide enjoyment.

Self awareness is a much more powerful tool.  Effective and sustainable change first requires personal accountability, that is acceptance of the need to change.

Think of an addict.  It is well known the first step to recovery is accepting the fact recovery is needed.  Telling the addict they are an addict (a form of criticism) seldom works.

Constructive Criticism

To be fair, maybe Lebron is thinking of constructive criticism.  What a croc.  This is the classic case of abusing the English language to make something bad sound good.

Just the fact that someone felt the need to invent the term to sugar coat the value of criticism is proof enough to me that in and of itself, regardless of the kind, criticism is a bad thing and really most people don’t get stronger, they just dislike you.

To Lebron, I say, stick to basketball.  When you next run into me, remember, I see no value in criticism so do me a favour and keep it to yourself.

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Recharging

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Typically the holiday season includes a lot of social interactions.  For those that lean toward introversion as a underlying personality trait this can lead to a need for solitary time to recharge.

This is the case for me and although spending time with our children and grandchildren at various times and locations during the recent holiday celebrations was terrific, I do need time to recharge.

Even Immediate Family Interractions

My older brother called me on New Years Eve.  I really enjoyed the chat but it came on the tail end of a very socially interactive couple of weeks and I was ready to hibernate.

Fortunately, New Years day and the following Monday (statutory holiday replacement) afforded me this opportunity and I returned to work fully recharged and ready to dive in.

Don’t be Miserly with your Recharge Time

While not everyone needs time alone to reflect,relax and re-energize, typically introverts do.  This is a common trait for those of introverted personalities.

It is important not to be miserly with yourself when it comes to solitary reflective time.  The results, when you do not allow yourself enough time to recharge, can be quite negative.

A key outcome of not spending enough time re-energizing is reduced ability to handle criticism, percieved slights or even just  inability to participate in normal social interractions.

You can become sharp, grumpy or on occassion disassociated and non responsive.  So when you need time to recover, take it.  This time of year that very likely could be the case if you are not an extrovert by nature.

Don’t ignore your personal needs, to do so could be at the peril of your percieved friendly and outgoing nature.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

I’ll tell you where to go

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I came across a quote the other day that really resonated with me.

“If you tell people where to go, but not how to get there, you’ll be amazed at the results”. – George S. Patton

Personally I really like the part about telling people where to go.  I do that as often as possible.  In reality though, this direction is the key to strong and effective leadership .

The Leader Within

Typically, powerful groups, whether bound by culture, geography, beliefs or common goals operate most effectively when everyone exhibits leadership capabilities.

This is a rare circumstance with the strong leader at the front and the flock following behind.  Unfortunately this autocratic style can be effective to some degree and is easier on the sheep.

Intuitively though, if everyone on your team knows where they going (the goal) exhibit strong communication skills (both outgoing and incoming), and continuously leverages self awareness and personal accountability, strong results will be the outcome.

Single Leader Not Required

Some find it hard to envision a group environment that is not structured like a triangle or pyramid with a single point at the top.  To operate otherwise must lead to chaos.

On the contrary, in fact, a group of individuals each utilizing their inner leadership skills is much more powerful than a single leadership point operating on the “monkey see, monkey do” concept.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Learning to talk

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Our two and a half year old grand-daughter is really beginning to talk. She has a large vocabulary and is starting to string words together into a sentence.

Word Association

I am really enjoying the  initial word association.  Recently our granddaughter was taken back to the local community centre for some first time skating.  She had been there before to visit the water park.

As we approached the building she pointed and exclaimed “water” several times. I was quite puzzled.  Had she suddenly gotten a tremendous thirst.

Her father clarfied for me water was a reference to swimming here before, in the water.  When we left the building, this place had become more about ice, the concept for that moment.

Observing this self awareness of her surroundings develop is facinating to me.  Clearly the brain is developing and storing simple associations.

Over time these will continue to become more and more complex.  Ultimately this will continue throughout her life.   The capacity to gather and store new learnings continues to old age and in some cases even beyond.

Understanding

I find watching the developing comprehension is a lot of fun .  Simple concepts like hot, cold, fast and slow for example are initially developed from very a  basic understanding and slowly grow into more complex analysis.

In the beginning it looks like a lot of circumstantial recognition is going on.  It’s a cup of coffee – hot.  That is, this or that.  Gradually this develops into a deeper comprehension of the context.

 

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Eustress – gotta have it (as opposed to distress)

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Janos Sayle, working at McGill University in Montreal Canada discovered and documented two distinct kinds of stress.  A simplified version of  these types defines them as a stress reaction resulting from good news (eustress) or resulting from bad news (distress).

Living without eustress

A colleague commented today how it nice it would be to have no stress.  Relaxation, now that is the goal.  Personally I am not totally certain how beneficial this perspective is.

There have been numerous studies which appear to definitely demonstrate that retiree’s who do not experience eustress tend to die earlier than those that do.

Good stress is motivating.  Simply it give you a reason to live and so supports your desire to do so.  Bad stress can result in undesirable physical impacts, lack of good stress also does.

Wandering Aimlessly

Intuitively wandering aimlessly with no pressures, demands, purpose or constraints,( for example being a beachcomber traveling the world searching for the perfect climate, pace, culture)  might seem like an ideal situation.

In reality this is really not the case, even the beachcomber has some stressful activities – the search itself for the beach for example is not fully without stress.

Back to Balance

Of course the level of eustress must be managed and balanced with low stress situations (whether good or bad stress).  That being said though, there is a strong case for the benefit of experiencing some level of eustress .

Avoid it altogether at your own peril.