Tag Archives: happiness

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Finding your Happy Place

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For each of us the definition of “happy place” is a bit different.  The concept is common to all, that is, a place you can recharge and create a fresh perspective for yourself.

It’s a break from the chaos, a retreat from uncertainty, a shelter from stress, a shot of vitality.  What exactly is entailed in getting to your happy place is very personal, after all, it’s your happy place?

Stress Release

Having some stress can be motivational, distress is a form of stress which can be harmful.  When you percieve something to affect you adversely but not feasible for you to resolve it typically causes distress.

One  approach to aleviate the distress before it can harm you psycholigically, even physically , is to enter your happy place. You can use this technique to manage distress for a period.

The stressful event may pass  naturally ( like the hurricane that changes diection and misses you)  or the bad thing could happen (the hurricane hits), it is done and then you can go about recovery activities.

The happy place technique is a tool to help you focus on the positive.  It enables you to remain distracted from something where thinking about it is not helpful.

Mental Exercise

Finding your happy place is really just a personal mental exercise.  You are in control of your brain,  What you think about, the context and the associated stress elements are yours to manage.

Next time you feel the need for a little relief, find your happy place and go there. It is in your power, all that is required is accepting you have the ownership and capability.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Celebrate

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The holiday season (largely North America) or just the holidays (in many Western influenced countries) occur this time of year. To coin a common song lyric “T’is the season to be jolly.”

I often wonder why we designate a time of year for celebration. Granted though in the Northern hemispere where many Christmas traditions arose (a hallmark of the season) it is dark and cold, not a bad time for a celebration.

Life Long

While it is definitely a bit idealistic, I wonder why we don’t all treat our lives as a year long celebration. It is nice to have designated highlights, whether religious, political or just historic; however outside of these organized holidays, why not be joyous year round.

To some extent the answer probably lies in group think. A common belief that this is the time to rejoice makes it easier to participate. Everyone is doing it so we feel peer pressure to participate.

Motivated by Desire

Of course in the case of pleasurable activity the peer pressure does not need to be strong, as most want to join in anyway. Except for the odd scrooge participation in the holiday happiness is usually virtually unanimous.

With few exceptions, the pursuit of happiness is a common human behaviour so participating in the theme of the holiday season is not hard to do. It is easily embraced and hence successful.

Keep it Going

Although this is not a unique thought, I am sure it has been said many times and in many ways, this year consider keeping it going. stay in the holiday spirit year round. You might be surprised how it is not only better for you but for those around you as well.

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Measuring Success

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We have many ways of measuring achievement.  The measure can be aligned with the objective directly or peripheral factors.  Also it can be highly objective or subjective or somewhere in between.

For example if you are  playing a game of golf the measure could be your score or it could be your score against the scores of others.  Both of these are pretty objective measures.

However, it could be how you feel.  This is a more subjective measure not necessarily related to your score but rather how much fun you had.   Did your level of enjoyment meet expectations?

Measuring your Daily Activities

Most of us spend our days performing  activities involving mental or physical effort, i.e., work.  (To clarify financial compensation is not required to classify  spending your time as work).

What is the success measure relative to this work.  Like the golf game, there are multiple measures.  You can objectively assess if the goal of your activity was achieved and to what level.

The subjective measure of accomplishment can also apply.  Was it a good outcome, high quality, appreciated, etc.?

However, Over the long term, I would argue, the subjective measure of enjoyment and happiness is the most important.

If you are laughing and having fun the lack of more concrete success, while not desirable or to be encouraged, can be overlooked and absorbed to some extent.

This is not to propose that achieving what you set out to do is not important, but it should not be at the expense of your personal happiness.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Seeing Answers

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Our lives are a series of events.  We get to choose how to interact with, embrace or even ignore these occurrences.  And of course we can create them as well as just being a passenger along for the ride.

How you percieve the things that impact you, including those that are self initiated, is usually either optimistic or pessimistic or some balance of these two extremes.

Optimism

This is a preconceived belief in a successful outcome.  Your perspective focuses on solutions, that is sucessful outcomes.  What answer, when applied to this event will result in success.

Of coures this approach relies on your awareness of what answers support your goals and objectives.  Your own happiness and pleasure can be achieved only if you know what you seek (the answer).

Pessimism

Your perspective leans toward believing the worse will happen and your confidence in the future is low or non existant.  This is a choice that can reduce disappointment but it diminishes the opportunity for enjoyment and pleasure.

Positive Attitude

As commented in a recent post, attitude equals behaviour.  Your behaviour, ( how you act) defines you.  Simply put, a slight varience on the old saying “you are what you eat” becomes “you are what you do”.  This accurately depicts how others decide how to percieve us, it is based on behaviour.

Optimistic approaches to everything you encounter forces a positive attitude leading to exemplary behaviour and voila you are a star.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Feeling Good

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Most people engage in a regular activity whether it is paid employment, charitable work or just a participation in a hobby or an association.

For me this very broad calassification could be playing golf regularly, traveling or going to work at a physical or mental job.  What I am refering to is how you spend the bulk of your time.

How do you Feel?

When you think about your prime activity,  the thing you spend the majority of your time doing, does it elicit positive thoughts?  Just to clarify,  you might spend a significant part of your days sleeping (maybe even a thirds) this question is not about that.

This is not about frustrating moments in a point in time but the overall feeling you get when thinking about the way you spend most of your time.

If what you do is not making you happy overall you should consider a change.  Broadly this will be one of three things (these are generic descriptions)

  • Pick another activity, that is stop your current one (i.e., quit your job, swim instead of golf and so on).
  • Change the way you feel about the activity.  Simply put happiness is an internal feeling you own, check out why you think the way you do and change your mind.
  • Change the things that are bothering you (e.g., take golf lessons so you get lower scores, ask your boss to help solve the things bothering you, manoeuvre things so the obsticles are removed.

What ever you choose to do, do something.  Don’t worry, be happy.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

International Day of Happiness

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March 20th is the International Day of Happiness,  unanimously adopted by  the United Nations 193 member states in 2012.  This day is intended to highlight the need to recognize the pursuit of happiness as a human right and a “fundamental human goal.”

Not New

There is no question this is a noble goal albeit not a new one.  Throughout the ages since dawn of civilization humans have philosophized about the pursuit of happiness.

Philosophers  such as Bhudda, Socrates, Confucius, Aristotle, Plato, Epicurus, Mencius, Abu Hamid al-Ghazali, and religious figures like Jesus, Abraham, Moses, and the prophet Muhammad have all comptemplared the definition of happiness, and how to achieve it in some shape an form.

My own personal philosophy of life stems from the work of plato.  I consider my happiness founded in the belief I can persue my own maximum pleasure as long as I don’t impinge on that of others.

Making it Happen

Sadly creating a worldwide environment of happiness and joy for all, while a noble objective, is hard to do.  A simple poll in my workplace today revealed few (actually I found none) aware this was International Happiness Day.

The need to declare such a day, to bring attention to the basic human requirement for global happiness is in itself unfortunate. Happiness should be endemic, the norm rather than something to strive for.

Ah, Utopia.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

If your happy and you know it……

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Clap your hands.  A simple but accruate lyric to what is often thought of a little ditty for children to sing.  It is a motivational song with a purpose.

Happiness is a state of mind.  Really it is that simple.  To paraprhase the song, if your happy others will know by the way you behave.  Happy behaviour is much more pleasant than any other kind.

Constantly Happy

Let’s check the assumptions.  If happiness is a state of mind, it is your mind and only yours so you could choose to be happy all the time.  Is this a realistic assumption?

Obviously external and environmental factors, for example being subjected to  physical torture or starvation make the choice more diificult, perhaps even impossible.

Staying Happy

Admittedly,  there are factors that can impinge on your ability to maintain a state of happiness.  However, given happiness is a state of mind, you do have a lot of influence.

Consider:

  • through personal meditation, self talk or just deep thought be very clear what makes you happy
  • plan your behaviour around seeking and attaining happiness
  • remember always, not matter what rhe circumstances, environmental or contextual nothing can make you unhappy, really only you can do that.

YOU ARE IN CONTROL, no matter how hard it may seem, you DECIDE, no one else.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Law of Diminishing Returns

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A colleague shared his thoughts with me  today on the law of diminishing returns.  That is the point at which profits or benefit gained is less than the amount of money or energy invested.

In this model,  profit or benefit rises at an exponential rate to the inflexion  point and then the yield curve flatens.  Thus the effort and time to achieve the same benefit experienced in the exponential growth phase is much more.

Applying the Law to Happiness

In a given context my own experience completely supports the law of diminishing returns (it’s called a law rather than a theory because it has been proven mathematically)

Mathematical proof, though,does not apply to emotional measures such as happiness and this is where my collegue and I differed.  He attempted to apply the model to diminishing happiness with financial returns.

That is, financial gain or benefit drives a larger increase in your personal happiness before the inflexion point is reached.  After that a much greater ruturn is needed to raise your happiness.

Happiness is a chice, not a creation

While I understand the law of diminishing returns as applied to operational or manufacturing processes, I am not convinced it can apply to levels of emotional well being.

For example, I have definitely observed personally that 100 auto workers output is not 10 times that of 10 workers.  It is not a linear relationship and that fact can be mathematicaly proven.

Happiness however is not manufactured or created.  You choose wether you are happy or not together with the associated level of magnitude.

While your  knowledge, material wealth and personal stature  may well influence the level of happiness you choose to feel, it is still ultimately entirely your choice.