Most people allow themselves to become, angry, fearful, nervous, annoyed, upset and so on.  These emotions can elicit unpleaseant results.

For example, it is clear that some anger related behaviours can dissaffect others.  Often the outcomes can lead to regret, dissappointment or even internal anger for acting the way you did.

Unfortunately, it is most likely these behaviours cannot be erased.  The impact could be diminished or the situation resolved and it could be an improvement.

Most likely though the journey was not pleasent.

Why get Angry?

I am focusing on anger but the points I raise here can generally apply to any negative emotions.  External factors trigger the emotions, some very real, some only percieved.

I sometimes wonder whether the emotion I experience is totally witin my control.  Linked to this of course, is the question of whether the emotional experience was of value.

If it was fully in my control would I have stopped myself from getting angry (or annoyed)?  Would I have behaved more effectively as a result of tighter emotional control?

Managing how you feel

Managing how you feel, being aware of how others percieve you are in fact key life skills.  This is the principal at  the core of the iconic book by Dale Carnegie, “How to make Friennds and Influence Others”

In my view, a simplistic summary of the book is that it  covers behavioral skills you can use to ultimately manage your emotional reactions and the associated reactions.

It’s hard to practice these skills, but when you successfully avoid the unpleasant , the reward is great.