Tag Archives: requirements

You can’t always get what you want

The external factors associated with your perception that prevention of the progress, success, or fulfillment is occurring can be very real to you, however,  letting this result in frustration is a choice.

As the Rolling Stones sang back in 1968, “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you find you get what you need.”  For me, this is how we can avoid frustration.  Focus on what you need, not what you want.

 Focus

Getting what you need might require a significant effort but the result will be satisfying.  Focusing on things you require should never be frustrating, just plod on until you attain what is required. Ultimately you need it so you will find a way to get it.

Separating needs and wants (both of which can seem required, essential and important) is not easy but critical to avoid frustration.  Don’t waste time on the things you want.  Just relax and let it go, cause you don’t really need it.

Fine Line

There is a fine line between needs and wants and sometimes they are inseparable.  The yardstick is basically can you survive without it.  If no it is required.  For example, we need food to live ergo it is required.

However, this is an interesting requirement because of the devil in the detail.  How much and what kind of food is required.  We have our individual wants as it relates to food and we feel a need to satisfy desire but the reality is, core sustenance is pretty basic.

Separating wants and needs can be tricky but it ultimately it makes sense to stay chill about things that are nice to have but not absolute musts.

 

 

 

 

Making do with what you have

The Rolling Stones have had a long and prestigious career with many interesting songs ranging from pure entertainment to thoughtful and philosophical.

I have recently had some problems with my home office chair.  One of the wheels keeps falling off.  Of course, this can be a bit disconcerting, even dangerous when it happens you are getting out of the chair and it flips.

Getting What you Need

The chair issue is urgent to some degree, that is I need a comfortable chair so I can sit in front of my desktop screen for most of the day (with the pandemic we really are tied to the desktop for everything)

My issues drew me to one of my favorite iconic Rolling Stones tunes.  Musically it is really different (from a rock perspective) very choral in nature.  What struck me most though was the accuracy of the bridge lines.

You can’t always get what you want
But if you try sometimes, well, you might find
You get what you need

What I Want

In this specific case, I want an office chair I can rely on without having to worry about it tipping over or getting stuck as I try to roll away from the desk to leave.

Unfortunately I kind of wanted it stat.  Not being able to accomplish this, the chair is broken and the repair is not that feasible, I was stuck with getting what I needed. (At least I could get that though, through a wonky but temporary repair).

And this led me to hum the Stones tune all the while realizing that is life if you can’t get what you want then try hard to get what you need.  What else can you do?

Needs and Wants

Things required to live a healthy life are needs, everything else you desire is optional, albeit might be required to maximize your happiness.

Separating needs and wants can be a difficult task, but having a clear idea which is which can be most helpful. Needs are clearly a priority and should receive your focus.

Focus

Avoiding conflict between needs and wants helps ensure your efforts are focused on the best value proposition. That is, attaining the goal that gives the best return.

This requires self awareness coupled with the ability to be brutally honest with yourself. Categorizing needs versus desires is easier if you take the timee to define the attributes of each from a personal perspective.

You can then map the object of your desire to the qualities you defined as required to live or nice to have. This makes labling things as wants or needs easier to do.

Want or Need

Determining if something is required, versus just desired, means drawing some lines to suite your own personal situation. One size does does not fit every case.

Your bar should depend on impact. If you don’t attain an objective, what happens? In many cases life as you know it will go on, but could be negatively impacted.

A deficit of positive results is obviously impactful as well. The key to whether a thing is required (whether to avoid the negative or accent the positive is somewhat objective but completely related to impact.

Things with impacts devestating to you are needs, everything else is not.

 

 

Jumping to Solutions

You have probably heard the tired old phrase “jumping to conclusions”.  An interesting variation involves figuring out the answer before understanding what the problem or issue is.

I call this “jumping to solutions”.  Point of fact, this is built into the human psyche.  Many psychology experiments have been conducted to prove this behaviour is part of humans thinking process.

Of course these experiments were often structured to prove this was the right answer to the question.  Never the less,  my personal observations over time do validate this to be an accurate depiction of most peoples natural tendency.

Building Solutions

Often when we collaborate on defining what we need (i.e., the requirements) our intuitive understanding of the solution comes into play.  This is true in both work and personal context.

This can and often does result in the solution not being what we need and maybe not even addressing/resolving the problem.  Consider the following hypothetical exaggeration (for illustrative purposes).

You have been searching for transportation.  Meeting the needs of your wife and two small children form part of the requirements.  In your mind though the solution needs to be a luxury vehicle.

There probably are some good non-luxury vehicle solutions (and a luxury vehicle is probably not actually a requirement) yet when gathering the requirements somehow they indicate the solution should be a luxury sedan. You force it to be so because you have already decided the solution.

A key driver of arriving at this solution was the fact it was the answer you envisioned even before figuring out what you really needed.

Determining the solution before you know what you really need and want; be careful,  it can be costly and ultimately not meet the real requirements.