Tag Archives: secrets

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Its a secret

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When you have information that you do not intend to be seen or known by others it is a secret.  When you share this with someone, most likely a limited audience, it becomes no longer secret.

”Psst, hey you wanna hear a secret? “. This is really just a way of spicing up what you have to share.  The response is often an excited and urgent “Tell me!”.

Real Secrets

When information information has a limited audience it is not really secret but rather restricted.  Other terms for this are confidential, private, internal use and so on.

Real secrets must be internalized and belong just to us.  Having the need to keep secrets can become a soul crushing exercise.  Secrets are usually of an emotional nature and the reason for keeping them is often to protect ourselves or others.

There can be a real emotional cost to this practice.  Instinctively we want to share and choosing not to do so is most likely motivated by fear.

Lack of Resolution

Unfortunately keeping secrets, real secrets you do not and cannot share, often limits you from resolving the root causes of the secret in the first place.

You may initially experience some relief and hold your fears at bay but over time the hidden knowledge will continue to gnaw at you until it either bursts out and causes damage or you keep it to yourself and the damage is internal.

Consider carefully the ramifications of keeping secrets.  The option to find a way to share your secret without incurring the risks you fear is almost always worth exploring as the wisest path.

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Information and Power

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Our culture supports the concept that information can be used to influence and manipulate.  The more secret information you know the greater your stature.

It is possible to influence others behaviors by letting them know you have the information they don’t.   Knowing things others don’t (and making sure they know that) can enhance your power over them.

A Serious Business

Our society values secrets to the extent that sharing them can lead to deadly consequences.  Consider the common joke, “I’d tell you but then I’d have to kill you”.

Apparently, information sharing is a serious business.  Sharing information without permission or receiving the info you are not supposed to have can be deadly.

As I noted though, there is a real cultural aspect to secret information.  Our culture values parceling and containment of data.  We believe there is a need for secret information, so it exists.

We believe controlling access to information is important, the information in the wrong hands can be dangerous.   Trust, sharing, openness is valued but only under certain circumstances.

Unsubstantiated

My own personal experience has been the power to influence and impact is far greater through the practice of clear, frank and open sharing.

While I see many who believe having secrets gives them power and enhances there ability to lead others, it has been my experience this produces neither quality or sustainable outcomes.

Building your power base by keeping others in the dark and feeding them shit could work if people were mushrooms.

This approach can make you feel like a commanding presence and it probably does work that way to some extent, however, sharing (both ways) is almost always the better way.

 

Random thoughts – keeping you on your toes

Secret Information

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Information generally falls into one of four categories.

  • things you know that others do not (potentially restricted information)
  • things others know that you do not (potentially restricted information)
  • things you know and others know (public information)
  • things nobody knows, you do not even know you don’t know in some cases (the unknown)

Why Restricted?

The first two categories (info you know or info known by others) can be shared but that is not always the case.  In cases where it is knowingly withheld, it becomes restricted or secret information.

In the case of restricted information, people may be aware it exists but some people are purposely denied access to this information based on specific criteria.

The restriction principle is based on a belief the information could be misused or cause undesirable results if broadly or publically disseminated.

Secret Information

Secret information is actively hidden.  The subtle difference between this and restricted information is the intent is the information owner not only restricts access to the information but also supresses awareness that the information even exists .

Leveraging Restricted and Secret Information

Secret and restricted information exist for the purpose of manipulation.  That is,  limiting the availabilty of information is solely for the purpose of influencing or manipulating outcomes.

For me, this raises an interesting question.  Is there really any value to restricted or secret information.  Would not results be more collaberative and of a higher quality if everyone had a chance to participate?

Isn’t the practice of withholding or hiding things you know, more for your personal agenda (self interest) than for the protection of others?  Universal sharing reduces fear of the unknown and can make the job of influencing or manipulating more difficult.

The old saw, information is power, becomes less overarching a principle within environments where all information is shared openly.