Tag Archives: giving

Making a Difference

Everyone has the opportunity to be important in some way.  We can make a positive difference both in the way we view ourselves, others view us, and most importantly the way others view themselves.

I don’t mean this in a truly altruistic way because every human has a genetic leaning toward life being all about them.  Being the catalyst for positive and healthy change is good for everyone.  I view making a difference for others as not a totally unselfish act.

Volunteering

In a recent post, I highlighted the alternate perspectives in which work can be viewed.  That is, either an activity to earn a livelihood or just using your strength and facilities to do something.

Volunteering is work but not specifically undertaken to earn a livelihood but rather to improve the common good of all.  This probably categorizes it into leisure time or time-off when compared against working for a livelihood.

The focus of leisure time is for pleasure, we choose to do it, ergo volunteering can give us pleasure.

For Example

I recently joined the board of Camp Quality  Canada as a volunteer director.  I had been open to joining a non-profit board as a volunteer since the early 1990s but personal motivation and opportunity never matched up until recently.

The organization’s focus is on providing uplifting experiences for children with cancer and blood disorders, largely through summer camps.

Due to the pandemic, the camps have been held virtually this summer.   I had the opportunity last week to attend a virtual cabin session.  I was blown away.

The volunteer counselors’ dedication and desire to make a difference was crystal clear.   And they succeeded in spades.   The whole experience reinforced for me the huge value of working to make a change  for the better.

The benefits are clear, everyone wins.  The campers, counsellor’s and myself all had an uplifting experience and felt good about it.

 

 

 

Gifts – giver or receiver

About ten years ago my mother clearly and definitively advised her children (and their children) that she did not wish to receive gifts (birthday, Christmas or any other).

This is a wish the family has not been able to respect, although the gifts she gets these days are small and usually consumable (my mother has an understandable desire to stop acquiring things).   For me this is simply because, to some extent gift giving is more for the giver than the receiver.

I recently participated in a small celebration which included some gifts.  The recipient was appreciative but suggested for future occasions just a card or mild recognition was all that was needed.  Without thinking (I do that some times) I blurted out “But this is not about you”.

Following a round of polite laughter there was an interesting discussion where it was pointed out the target of the celebration (and gift receiver) was technically the point of the get together and therefore intuitively it was actually about them.  This point I do not argue, my comments were focused on the act of gift giving itself.

Charity

Recently I gave a large monetary gift to the United Way.  There could be lot’s of reasons for this:

  • tax break  (paying the government less money feels good)
  • supporting an organization whose work I respect
  • helping others who need the money more than I do
  • helping others to understand what a nice person you are

What is interesting to me though is to some degree all these reasons have a component that is about me, not the recipient and arguably it’s mainly about making myself feel good.

Not a bad thing

Being altruistic because it makes you feel good is not a bad thing.

Considering the overall picture though, I believe the motivation for giving is not as important as the act of altruism itself.  Motivation is certainly very individual (it is about how the giver feels) and that is as it should be.

On the whole helping others appears to be an intrinsic human trait (with both nature and nurture drivers).

And the Point

If you want to give me stuff – give away.  I will happily accept in order to support your need to enhance self worth.