I have always wondered what the intent is of a verbal attack.. By this I mean phrases that start with the third person and end with an accusation or insult.

For example:

• you make me mad, you are such an idiot
• you don’t know how to communication, I can’t understand you
• how dare you include me without my consent
• Next time, I ‘d appreciate it if you did not do that

And the list goes on endlessly.

To What Purpose?

Although logic is my friend, for t(e life of me I cannot figure out the value equation behind these kind of messages.  Anyone who presumes they will be taken positively probably needs a rethink.

The shock value or bullying nature might be an attempt to schock a behaviour change but it should not take a rocket scientist to figure out attacks like this will never be well received.

Bullying in the Workplace

A common definition of bullying is acts or verbal comments that could ‘mentally’ hurt or isolate a person in the workplace.

These charges against your dignity or self esteem are simply verbal comments that cause mental anguish.  Yet, many continue to act as if this is acceptable behaviour.

Seeking Results

Although there must be some people who believe these direct blunt personal attacks can elicit the results they seek I learned long ago, that just is not the case.

While the immediate reaction might lead to the behaviour you desire the long term effects are always negative.  If I were to write a book about how to make enemies and build negative influence, this technique would figure prominently.

A word to the wise, when someone try’s this behaviour on you, respond bluntly and clearly.  For many of these bully’s this is the only response that works.